Friday, May 1, 2009

Shaquille O'Neal

What's up number 32?! Shaq is my all-time fave basketball player. It's not a difficult choice, given what he's brought to the sport. He's played on the Lakers and the Heat, but I'm most excited watching him in the Suns. He's 7' 1" tall and weighs 325 pounds and has been playing for sixteen years. His salary is $21 million a year. I hope one day to rake in that kind of dough, but in the meantime, I play the lottery a lot.

Everyone knows he's a great basketball player. But there are SO MANY other cool things about him that nobody really knows. For example, he's got Superman lights in his home movie theater, a superman symbol on the floor of that room and a big superman blanket there too. We're kindred spirits, because Superman Returns was one of my favorite movies of all time. Clearly he's a movie buff, because he's even been in a few pretty good movies.

Since this is a sports blog, and I've had a few complaints that I've been straying away from my first love, I'll post some info about his '08-'09 season. He was co-MVP with Kobe Bryant (what a hack) and led the Suns to second place in their division. They sure needed him! He averaged 18 points, 9 rebounds and 1.6 blocks in the first half of the season.

Reebok Shaq Attack shoes with pumps!

He can flat out play.


  1. I hate to do this, but you've got a few stats wrong: He actually averaged 18 points and 10 REBOUNDS if you count the game against the Lakers that ended in the infamous brawl with the coaches and the one beer seller......

  2. Where do you get your sports figures, Ebony Magazine? Are you thinking of Indiana's Jermaine O'Neal, rather than Phoenix's Shaquille O'Neal?

  3. that movie s s00oo gay! can't believe u posted that.

    thought this waz a a sports blog, not some faggy video thing.

    i du nno what yr on, buddy. shaq sux, so do the suns.

    basketball in general is 4 fags like yao ming. post some real stuff like football or something.

  4. Robbie, I don't think this is the type of blog that will tolerate your hostility. Now, it's ok to have a difference of opinion, but when you say words like "gay" and "faggy", that's where it gets offensive.

    Yao Ming, is actually not gay. I even know that he's married.

    Also, Yao Ming made basketball cool again, haven't you seen Year of the Yao?

    I personally think football is a dumb sport, but I wouldn't tell people that they are "fags" if they like it.

    I think you just need to learn some general blog etiquette.....

  5. Robbie: How many movies have you been in?

    Shaq 6
    Robbie 0

    How about some cool Shaq quotes to change your mind?

    "I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet."

    That sounds like an awesome career change. Is there anything this guy can't do?

    "I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing."

    See Robbie? You like football, well so does Shaq.

    "I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok."

    Pretty down to earth guy too. And smart! Don't get me started:

    "Our offense is like the pythagorean theorem: There is no answer!"

    How's your math, Robbie?

    "I would like to be refered to as 'The Big Aristotle'."

    See how much more intelligent he is than you? Come back when you've got better (and nicer) things to say.